What is the key to finding the wrong love object? In love, there are many hidden personality contradictions in our hearts. These self-entanglements are the important reasons for the occurrence of love. As the saying goes, “it’s not that enemies don’t get together”, and love is often like this. For this kind of psychology, psychologists believe that one of the reasons for the strong attraction between lovers is actually to pursue the complete self. Psychology master Young believes that everyone has “dominant” and “recessive” (or “shadow”) personalities. In other words, in addition to expressing the “dominant personality” that everyone sees on the outside, each person also has a “shadow personality” that is the opposite, hidden in the heart. That is to say, a very lively person actually hides a very depressed side, while another very quiet person is likely to become restless in another unfamiliar environment. In terms of psychological theory, the shadow personality of an “analytical” person is a “feeling type”, because an “analytical” person emphasizes logical thinking and objective judgment, but when he emphasizes and expresses “rationality”, he will not know it. He subconsciously suppresses his delicate and sentimental “emotional” part of his personality to the depths of his subconscious and turns it into a recessive “shadow personality”.
Therefore, when a person meets a person of the opposite sex who has his own “shadow personality”, he often feels joyful in his heart, because the other person shows the personality traits that he lacks (or has been suppressed). Some people say that love objects are usually complementary personalities, which is why. When a silent person encounters a lively person, it is often his “shadow personality” who sees the sunshine and is inspired, and thus becomes extremely happy, and the shackled soul is freed. The opposite sex attracts, and the process of integrating and complementing the “shadow personality” and the “dominant personality” will gradually develop a more complete and mature personality. This process is also called the pursuit of the “complete self” by psychologists. Survive the emotional crisis safely. However, this combination is often called part of the pain of love. In the so-called run-in, the characteristics that attracted us the most in the past have become the most unbearable place for you. If in the past, you fell in love with his tenderness, then, it is very likely that you would complain about his lack of masculinity, and you fell in love with her liveliness, and you may also find her “wordy” and “childish”.
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