The first hurdle: the year after the honeymoon period.
Marriage is the direct result of in love, for love is warm, walk down the aisle two men, from love into hot marriage, preparation and wedding photography, the task of decorating their own homes, adjacent to the marriage certificate, and so on which is full of excitement and novelty for couples to accelerate upgrading, wedding night after marriage couples formal honeymoon, began a is different from the stage of the new husband and wife love life,
Two people such as glue such as paint, the so-called new new atmosphere.
Can be as a honeymoon, especially to the newly married the following year, all the same, life daily necessities, and the bride’s sweet gap is very big, no experience and prepared for couples may appear very impetuous mentality, especially after 80 s generation is the generation of advocate and make public individual character freedom, tolerance for marriage relatively before 70 couples a slight lack of overall,
If not handled properly, the marriage will most likely hit the rocks in the next year.
How to solve it?
The husband and wife should have a certain ideological preparation for this before marriage, can not imagine marriage as a paradise of eternal bliss and honeymoon by sensibility, for the psychological gap after the honeymoon period to want enough and sufficient understanding, so that the gap will not feel inadequate;
Should ADVOCATE INDIVIDUAL CHARACTER AND APPROPRIATE TOLERANCE AND MARRIAGE RESPONSIBILITY UNION RISE ADDITIONALLY, AFTER MARRIAGE AND BEFORE MARRIAGE ARE DIFFERENT, MAKE PUBLIC INDIVIDUAL CHARACTER MUST UNITE WITH THE COMMONALITY OF BOTH SIDES OF HUSBAND AND WIFE.
The second biggest obstacle: the wife is pregnant.
Arguably, the wife pregnant for marriage should be a positive role in promoting, this is, of course, that’s right, but is different from person to person, and the entire pregnancy for almost a year, time is not short, so at this stage of marriage crisis mainly by the “sex”, traditional idea is once the wife pregnant, couples sex life basic terminated, and due to her pregnancy, wife body harmony is swollen,
This TIME is very likely to be the husband of the dangerous moment of infidelity, which is of course mainly the responsibility of men, although such men are not many, but it does exist, before I also had a special article analysis of “wife pregnant when why became a man cheating?”
The reasons are psychological as well as physical, including men’s sense of family responsibility and morality.
How to solve it?
The wife’s pregnancy has become a dangerous period of marriage, which is of course a little unacceptable. The wife is suffering while the husband is having an affair. However, whether it is acceptable or not, this is indeed the real pain of marriage, but we must face and deal with it rationally.
First of all, couples should have a scientific understanding of sexual life during pregnancy, pregnancy is not equal to the taboo of sexual life, avoid the risk of early pregnancy and late pregnancy, and master good skills, husband and wife sexual life will not be substantially affected, avoid complete prohibition of sexual life, in the prime of life, who can endure ten months of sexual life?
In fact, there is absolutely no need to endure it;
Secondly, we should strengthen communication, so that the children in the belly become emotional ties and catalysts rather than obstacles;
Finally, as a husband, he should have a basic sense of marital responsibility and moral awareness. The husband should be mainly responsible for the problems of his wife’s marriage during pregnancy, so he should make more sacrifices.
The third biggest obstacle: after the baby is born.
Child, husband and wife, of course, on top of the world, but also may lead to another problem, that is to add a mouthful of person, and it is “little emperors”, the first is economic pressure increase, the second at the same time of enjoying happiness, psychological pressure also increased, and the birth of the child makes basic drawn to the child’s attention to husband and wife, husband and wife have no personal life, no communication,
Sexual life quality to drop, the so-called “two people” world “facts have gone, children virtually becomes a” third party “, the relationship nervous, indifference, and even a loss, because children often appear noisy, but in fact is not completely because of the child’s problem, children had just become a noisy excuse, lane is bad to take marriage into the corner.
How to solve it?
Couples should create conditions to reduce pressure, such as conditions can ask a nanny or ask elders to help;
To face up to the problem of declining sexual quality of husband and wife, properly allocate part of the energy in the private life of husband and wife, husband and wife should pay special attention not to put all the energy on the children, try to avoid children from childhood with their parents in bed;
Husband and wife should be alert to the child’s “third party” effect, the child’s negative barrier into the lubrication bond between husband and wife.
The fourth obstacle: the seven years after marriage, the so-called “seven year itch.”
As before, during and after the marriage in five to seven years into the so-called marriage itch, the passion of life seems to be slowly faded, and everything looks so dull, couples without leisure, did not have very much in love, the satisfaction of both parties to the marriage, husband and wife have no communication, no communication, love, friendship, only the family seems to be difficult to maintain,
There is trouble not to talk to each other, there is also too lazy to share with each other, this period, adultery peak formation.
How to solve it?
Husband and wife should learn to adapt to the insipid marriage, rational look at the insipid marriage, at the same time to actively create opportunities to find the passion of the old days, in addition to love, husband and wife should strengthen friendship and family affection more, when the husband or wife should say to the other side listen to the heart to pour out to others, husband and wife both indissolubly blame.
To turn disadvantages into advantages, avoid mutual accusations, mutual tolerance and understanding is this period of husband and wife should pay special attention to, the husband and wife should be the greatest patience, the most care to help each other, in order to ensure that the marriage safely through the “seven-year itch”.
Fifth big difficulty: husband and wife enter menopause (after marriage 20 years or so).
Time and tide wait for no man, when a marriage into twenty years or so, the couple has more than forty years of age, physiology and some changes in your physical condition inevitably, wife menopause, easy to become irritable, even a bit paranoid personality, on the one hand, fear of aging, on the other hand worries about the charm of the lost, at the same time the husband energy has also dropped, no longer energetic,
Career also seems to be at the peak of innovation can not continue to make new breakthroughs, all this in the invisible impact of the quality of marriage, deal with bad, marriage is also very likely to overturn at this time, although the old couple should pay special attention to.
How to solve it?
Overconfidence, this time more marital conflict is due to physiological reasons, due to less, if can not get the understanding of each other, comfort, then most likely to the other members of the opposite sex to find new passion and understanding of relief, so the understanding of each other, mutual encouragement and comfort is particularly important, and this time,
The psychological support of each other is more important than ever.
Love can be short and beautiful, such as a flash of electricity;
Marriage must be really flat, like a long stream.
This is the law of love, is the true meaning of marriage, worth every couple to savor.
Marriage is a lifetime career of husband and wife, to pay efforts to operate, marriage is in the husband and wife hand in hand across again and again after the more rich connotation, only more shows the treasure of the old age, marriage also sends out her real charm.
