While the Internet has created opportunities and convenience for all aspects of social life, it has also brought many challenges. Many people, especially adolescent children, are bewitched by the angelic appearance of the Internet, and they cannot extricate themselves from it. On May 28, Kong Qingmei, an expert on adolescent psychology, taught parents how to help their children get rid of Internet addiction. Internet addiction is to obtain a kind of self-psychological satisfaction. Their thoughts, emotions and behaviors are controlled by the Internet, the time is increasing, and they can even leave everything behind in order to be online. When you do not use the Internet, you will experience symptoms such as restlessness and general discomfort. In the end, it not only affects physical health, but also becomes trance, anxiety, irritability, loneliness and depression, and even distorted personality. Some data show that more than 80% of college students’ academic interruptions are related to Internet addiction; Internet addiction is an important reason for the decline in work quality and efficiency of adults; many violent activities of children are also learned from the Internet. What is the reason why so many people stay on the Internet all day long and do not want to leave? On the one hand, the Internet itself has a strong attraction: it can escape from reality; do not take responsibility for what you do, etc. On the other hand, individual character defects and some inappropriate family education methods, such as lack of self-confidence, sensitive introversion, parental doting or neglect, and coercion, will make children vulnerable to the temptation of the Internet.
In dealing with Internet addiction, parents must grasp several principles.
First, it should be sparse and not blocked. Children love to surf the Internet, and some parents smash their computers and unplug the network cable, which will lead to more serious family conflicts. Parents should not stay and entangled in the level of Internet use, but should go behind the scenes and find the deep-seated psychological reasons for their children’s Internet use.
Second, cultivate children’s self-control. This requires parents to spend time and energy to “nurture” the child, rather than “control” the child. Some children are not addicted at first, but their parents don’t trust them. As soon as the child touches the computer, the parents will watch them closely, which makes the children less and less trust their parents and become more and more involved in the Internet. In this regard, parents can put the computer in the study and living room instead of the child’s room, so that the family can have the opportunity to participate and interact together, instead of the child playing in the room, and the mother pushing the door to check after a while.
Third, use alternatives to meet the child’s psychological needs. Parents need to observe and communicate to understand what aspects of their children are not satisfied, such as lack of parental love, learning frustration, lack of playmates, etc. After finding the reasons, they will compensate. For children with poor academic performance, who can only get a sense of achievement in online games, parents can put forward minimum requirements in learning, such as passing a pass, so that he can achieve it, and then give encouragement to meet this requirement, and then gradually raise the standard . For children who lack other ways of playing, parents should encourage their children to go out and play with their peers more, or stay with their children more often, and invite children from other families to be guests at home. For children who are rebellious and deliberately oppose their parents, parents should give priority to improving the parent-child relationship, and then solve the problem of Internet access.
Fourth, in terms of specific operation methods, parents can try to negotiate with their children. Gradually reduce the time spent on the Internet within 2 months. For example, if the Internet is more than 8 hours a day, it will be reduced to 6 hours in the first week, 4 hours in the second week, 3 hours in the third week, and 2 hours in the fourth week. Give rewards and punishments based on your child’s performance. Punishment is not beating and scolding, but appropriate deprivation of children’s favorite food and activities, such as not eating ice cream, not watching TV, etc. Finally, parents need to correct several misunderstandings. First, children who are addicted to the Internet are not necessarily bad children with no future. We want to be wary of extreme examples, but don’t be spooked. Adolescents are extremely malleable and have the possibility of correction at different levels. As long as parents do not give up, there is hope for children. Second, Internet addiction is not formed overnight. You can’t just look at the results and ignore the process of accumulation in children’s growth. Third, Internet addiction is not just a child’s problem, it is a multi-faceted problem in the family, school, and society. Parents should also adjust themselves at the same time. Fourth, Internet addiction is not an ideological and moral problem, and parents cannot solve it by preaching. This is not a superficial “playful, unmotivated”, but has a deep-seated psychological need.
Fifth, the underlying psychological problems behind Internet addiction are often much more serious than simple addictions.
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