“Puppy love” is an old topic, but it is also an unavoidable topic. The boys and girls in the rainy season are at an ignorant age, full of doubts and curiosity about the opposite sex and emotions. So, how should we parents face the problem of “puppy love” in our children? According to Hu Qian, a major in applied psychology at the Anhui Provincial Psychiatric Center affiliated to Anhui Medical University, puppy love mainly refers to the love relationship established by boys and girls in adolescence in junior high school and high school. This kind of love relationship is not very mature, and because students have more pressure to go to school, the attraction to the opposite sex and the instability of love relationships may have an impact on students’ learning. The lack of normal communication between them often leads to more adverse effects. Regarding how parents deal with their children’s “puppy love problem”, Hu Qian said that parents should do a good job in psychological construction from the following aspects:
- Understand the possible reasons why children fall in love early. On the one hand, it is to find spiritual support. The pressure of going to school is full of the life of junior and senior high school students, especially in the third and third year of junior high school, everyone’s “nerves” are tense. At this time, a little comfort and talk between the opposite sex may make the two feel good about each other. On the other hand, adolescent boys and girls are still ignorant about love. Influenced by certain romance novels and film and television dramas, even the love stories in textbooks undoubtedly have a huge temptation for these young boys and girls.
- Active communication, only sparse but not blocked. The parents of children who are in puberty now are mostly born in the 75s and 80s. Maybe the parents also had premature love when they were young, so it should be understood that blindly prohibiting at this time will easily arouse the children’s rebellious psychology. Parents can choose a suitable time, such as the evening after the child finishes homework, or after family dinner, the quiet and happy atmosphere can relieve the tension of both parties, and have an in-depth conversation with the child to solve the child’s possible troubles, such as study pressure, Or dissatisfaction with parents, and reasonable demands, and then talk about love issues. If the communication is not smooth, it must be stopped in moderation to reduce the occurrence of conflicts.
- Create a good family atmosphere. A loving family environment will make children feel more at ease to share their “little secrets” with their parents. Even if they have a love for the opposite sex, the child will take the initiative to communicate or mention something with one of the trusted parents. Children’s heart changes will also be better understood. It is recommended that parents, as long as the relationship problem does not affect the child’s study and life, can take a guiding attitude to let the child have a healthy and happy “childhood” time.
- Maintain close contact with the school. Frequent communication with teachers can help to understand the child’s learning and psychological dynamics. When a child is in puppy love, on the premise of actively communicating with the teacher, understanding and respecting the child’s emotional changes, gently help the child to coordinate and deal with the difficulties and troubles of adolescence.
