I am a college graduate who has just worked for two years. I have an emotional matter and would like to hear your opinion.
My girlfriend wasn’t a virgin when we met, and I was still a virgin.
I asked her what number of men I had slept with, and she said it was the fifth, and I asked her who were the others?
She said the first is the first love boyfriend of middle school, two people went to a different city after taking an examination of the university, the result of the big one did not read the boyfriend had another new love, broke up with her.
She made a senior boyfriend in the school when she was a sophomore, and later her boyfriend graduated abroad and went abroad because of the other party’s family.
Junior year, her classmates for her third object are introduced, and is outside, two people in a period of time found in many parts of the gap is too big, they broke up, the fourth is the net friend, also is the understanding of the big three, at that time she was with the third man always quarrel, the net friend always teach her, when senior went out of town for some time, her internship, she netizens went to see him,
She had sex with her online friend at his hotel.
I didn’t know her until after she graduated from college, when she was still seeing her online friend. I don’t know if there was always that kind of relationship, but I think there was.
Then we started dating, and the first time we had sex, I realized she wasn’t a virgin, but I didn’t think much of it, because you have to date during all four years of college, and sex is common.
I almost had sex with my ex-girlfriend, and she was like, “Come on in if you want.” We’d been sleeping in bed naked for days, and that was the only thing missing. I was like, “No, what if we don’t get together?
So we didn’t, and we did break up, and I was single until I met my girlfriend.
I don’t have a virgin plot, but when I know her sexual history, feel with her to have slept with too many men, if only one or two also calculate, but she from freshman to senior year, not counting me, four, she this person is too casual?
What happens when she gets married now?
Sometimes also feel unfair, I am a virgin, and she, with so many people, I feel very uncomfortable, sometimes want to go out to find other women to bed, so I have been more fair to me, of course, I just think, and did not do so.
Thank you for your trust in me. Let me talk about my opinion for your reference.
Many girls will hide their real history from their boyfriends, and even use artificial methods to become fake virgins. Even if it is to reduce the number, as you said, it is normal to say that it is one or two, but it is difficult to verify, even impossible to prove things.
And your girlfriend pours beans on you like a bamboo tube, saying all four in one breath.
First of all, I think it means she’s serious about you.
If I’m just playing with you, emotionally and physically, there’s no need to tell you so much.
Telling you shows that she’s seriously thinking about the future, doesn’t want to keep her past from you, and is afraid that if she doesn’t tell you now, it’ll make it harder to talk later.
You know, it might make you feel better if she kept it from you, but what are you losing?
It’s her honesty with you.
Which is more important to you, a false number you can live with, than an honest one?
Second, she chose an opportune moment.
If I had said it to you at the very beginning, it would have scared you away. If I had said it to you later, when I was talking about marriage, or even after marriage, it would have been more difficult for you to accept than now.
At this point, on the one hand, you’ve been talking for a while, and you have a solid foundation, on the other hand, if you don’t feel comfortable with it, it’s not too late for you or her to break up.
I think she was prepared for the worst before she told you.
Third, she is actually vulnerable deep inside and needs to seek comfort and relief.
If she is really a strong heart very hard woman, she may choose to never confess to you, hide from you for a lifetime.
But that’s not who she is, and she needs to speak up and be tolerated so she can face you later.
So, no matter how she appears on the surface, it is her shield shell to protect themselves, the heart is still weak, but not necessarily easy to admit in front of you.
Fourthly, simply in terms of the number, four can not be said to be less, but also can not be said to be a lot, after all, the current social environment is becoming more and more open, and college students are in a specific living environment.
It is now common for twentysomething boys and girls to have double digits of sexual experience.
Judging from your description, her affairs with the first four men were relatively brief and simple, without any of the entanglements and simpatisiness of the plot, so I think she would be one of those people who prefer to be straightforward but lack patience.
On the one hand, you can say that she is casual and flippant, but on the other hand, you can also say that she is not the kind of person who is fussy, noisy and obsessed.
Like you and you go to bed, the end is over, feelings can take up to put down, this kind of woman live not tired, will not all day to toss others half dead.
Fifth, you’re worried about whether she’ll sleep with someone else in the future. I’m here to tell you the answer you don’t want to hear: There are no guarantees. The key is the future of your relationship.
In the future, if your relationship changes, it’s entirely possible for her to sleep with someone else, and breaking up with you won’t be too difficult.
On the plus side, she’s not the kind of person who will mess you up and burn you out because she can pick it up and put it down.
Finally, you say that you sometimes think about sleeping with another woman. The question is: If you do, can you be as honest with her?
What would happen if you came clean?
My advice is, now you don’t rush to find another woman make digital balance, just don’t think injustice, you are in my heart to her secretly run four derailed “license” ok, if you are in my life and she is able to love to the old, then you can give you the four licenses to the grave buried, if can’t love anymore, after that and then take out is not late.
Judging from your affair with your ex-girlfriend, you are a man who takes responsibility for yourself, others and life seriously.
Things have happened in the past, you can not rewrite, she can not rewrite, God arranged you meet, but did not arrange you to meet in the virgin, this is the fate of fate, blindly staring at the past in the form of self-abuse.
If you truly love each other, all you can and should do is to let bygones be bygones, move on, and take control of your future!
