They say children are the bond that binds couples together, but the results of an eight-year study by US researchers are surprising.
Researchers found that 90 percent of couples reported a decline in marital satisfaction after the birth of their first child.
The University of Denver followed 218 couples with funding from the National Institutes of Health.
According to the survey results, the vast majority of couples feel life changes after the birth of their first child, including changes in family finances and aspects of their life as a couple, and 90 percent of couples feel less satisfied with their marriage as a result.
Scott Stanley, a psychologist at the University of Denver, was quoted by the Daily Mail as saying that the results do not mean that childless couples do not experience a “downturn” in their relationships, but that the downturn comes relatively late.
Even childless couples feel the quality of their marriage deteriorates after a period (of marriage).
It’s just that having a baby accelerates the process, especially during the adjustment period after a baby is born, “Stanley says.
The findings were published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.
Couples who live together before marriage and have lower incomes are more likely to experience emotional distress after the birth of a child, according to the results of the Couples Differences survey.
Researchers say couples who live together for a long time before marriage may form a fixed world of two people’s life habits, once broken by a newborn baby, will feel pressure, leading to a cooling of the couple’s feelings.
On the other hand, low income also makes couples more likely to be dissatisfied with their married life because of their children.
Of course, not all couples experience a downturn after the birth of a child.
“Some couples report that their relationships are stronger after the birth of a child,” the study said. “Those who have been married longer and have higher incomes appear to experience fewer marital problems due to children than those who have been married for a shorter period of time.”
Alternative happiness researchers said the results could not be generalized and that children were not the “disruptors” of family happiness.
The birth of a child can make a family more complete and bring about family happiness different from marriage happiness.
“There are all kinds of happiness in life,” Stanley said.
“The happiness of marriage may fade for a while [after the birth of a first child], but the happiness and satisfaction of a couple building a home together becomes more complete.”
“It’s more positive and powerful, but it’s just not the focus of this study,” Stanley said.
A previous similar survey showed that parents are more depressed than those without children.
Researchers believe this is a modern phenomenon because today’s parents don’t get as much help from the family as previous generations.
