Internet language jokingly refers to ugly boys as “frogs”.
Later, the concept of “frog” was gradually expanded to include men with poor social conditions and themselves into the frog army, while girls who were better in all aspects were honored as princesses.
In our concept, the frog is usually looked down by people, and the princess is often to be looked up.
Because of the great disparity in social status between frog and princess, there is little chance for love between them.
Therefore, in the traditional marriage and love relationship, the frog and princess are almost easy to be forgotten by the corner of love – boys do not dare to climb the high branch, girls do not want to condescend to marry.
This embarrassing phenomenon is closely related to the level of social development.
In agriculture, the labor work as the main body of the social economic system, because men innate advantage in physiological conditions, many cultures tend to be more “vines tree” type of relationship, dependent on men, accustomed to woman think that gender role assignment more in line with the rules of social reality, the formation of the relationship is more stable and harmonious,
Therefore, the matching in marriage and love is limited to the form of male talent and female appearance, male strength and female weakness, male dominance outside and female dominance inside.
For this reason, when the brothers Grimm created “The Frog Prince” to tell us the love story of the male version of Cinderella, its influence is far less far-reaching than that of “Cinderella”, and it is more difficult to bring unlimited romantic reverie to people.
In order to make the love more acceptable to readers, the brothers Grimm had to attach a condition to the story that the frog was a prince.
Visible, even the love in the fairy tale, also can not escape the restriction of the concept of The Times.
Therefore, when the emotional reality of a princess falling in love with a frog appears around us, people will have a kind of uncomfortable feeling of subverting tradition.
With the continuous advancement of social development, when people create labor value, physiological conditions are no longer the dominant resources.
The mastery of knowledge, the high precision application of technical level and the effective combination of personality and work have become the main ability to perfect social responsibility.
In this context, women who have received the same education as men are bound to have more opportunities to reflect their social value.
And gender differences tend to minimize the result, is in the family division of labor and social role repositioning.
Therefore, like the love between brother and sister, the love between princess and frog is not only the inevitable result of social development, but also a sign of the progress of The Times.
It makes lovers more respectful of direct and simple emotional experiences and refuse to attach secular class conditions to them.
They will try to break the rigid definition of gender, scientific distribution of family tasks and responsibilities.
But the birth of any new relationship must go through the process of colliding with traditional ideas.
Therefore, when the romantic love based on sensibility needs to be continued by reason, the princess and the frog will inevitably bear the strong pressure from the external environment and the inner conflict.
Frogs, in particular, are more direct experience of stress.
Their readiness to deal with stress is a prerequisite and guarantee for the continuation of a close relationship.
A closer analysis of the pressures faced by the princess and the frog reveals that at its heart lies a limited perception of success.
Traditional ideas teach us that success is only achieved by attaining a certain social status and having a high-value social identity.
This concept tends to polarize our pursuit of success, bias us against the love and marriage of princesses and frogs, and ignore the fact that happiness is based on continuous and harmonious intimacy.
From this perspective, the diversified cognition of success can help us get rid of the shackles of success, so that the princess and the frog can play their respective roles in the society and gain satisfaction in a more reasonable positioning.
Since the harmony of love comes from the fair experience of both sides in the interaction process, the mutual recognition and appreciation is particularly important in the relationship between the princess and the frog.
It can effectively solve the bad attitude caused by pride and prejudice between the princess and the frog, so that both sides can jointly cope with external pressure.
Therefore, the development of a healthy love should be the process of discovering the strengths of the lover and converting the potential into effective value.
It is a positive construction of intimacy and a high recognition of personal efficacy.
In the modern view of love, intelligent people will no longer be shackled by the social identity and status of both parties, but reflect their personal value in all aspects of social life, which is also our scientific and diversified construction of success.
The love between the princess and the frog challenges the traditional concept of love. Once both parties decide to be involved in the love relationship, they need to appreciate each other with heart, and more importantly, they need to care for it with wisdom.
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